A Red Sox State of Maine

Presidential Erections

I'll watch baseball just about anytime, even if it's not the Sox playing, so I was looking forward to last  night's Nationals/Braves game (my boycott of ESPN continues except for Sunday nights). While I have a soft spot for former Red Sox radio broadcaster Jon Miller, his never ending suck up to Joe Morgan still drives me crazy (how many times did he mention Morgan's Hall of Fame credentials last night? We know, Jon!) Morgan's inaninity is second only to McCarver's. It was an exciting game-first walkoff win of the year-but unfortunately, the big night was ruined by the intrusive presence of the Smirking Chimp. I feel sorry for all the people who paid for the pleasure of seeing him in person, although a good many of them practically booed him off the mound-good for them! I wonder if Jon and Joe felt like taking a shower after having to spend time with him in the booth. If the truth be known, when he's not lying or otherwise fucking up the country, the president is actually quite charming, in a Forrest Gump kind of way. He'd probably be a good ambassador for the sport if everyone in the world didn't despise him the way they do. I remember on one of the Red Sox pre-game shows last summer Gordon Edes was talking about George Bush someday becoming the commissioner of baseball as he is such a devotee of the game, and I was horrified. I sent him off this email:

"George Bush as commissioner??? Sweet tapdancing Jesus! Thanks to this country's destruction by that arrogant, overbearing, lying f*ck, baseball is practically the only thing we have left to enjoy, and you want him to take over that, too???? He'd probably send the White Sox in to invade the Cubs during interleague play! Are you seriously trying to destroy MLB???

What were you thinking when you said that?????

Lisa"

Within minutes, I got this reply (yes, I saved it, because it made me laugh out loud!):

"I was thinking-and this is Gordon Edes, private citizen talking, not Gordon Edes, reporter-that this country would have been a helluva lot better off if Bud had stepped aside years ago and allowed Bush to become commissioner, where by definition he could not have wreaked as much damage as he has caused in his current capacity."

Nedless to say, Gordon Edes has since been my favorite reporter.

Favorite Quote of the Week

"Last year people said Curt Schilling was fat.  I thought Schilling was in fantastic shape.  If you see him in the locker room, he’s not fat, he just has a bad body."-Jim Rice, responding to a question on his new blog Ask14

Jim Ed, of course, had a fantastic body, on display perfectly in those form fitting polyesters of the 70s and '80s. Of course, it would have been even more fun had the Sox adopted the short-shorts the Celtics were wearing back in those days. Larry Bird? The Chief? Not so much. But Jim Ed in green tighties?...yowza!

We've Just Crossed Over...

...into the twilight zone between the season opener in Japan and the resumption of regularly scheduled programming-spring training-in LA. It's hard to go back to spring training again after having tasted the regular season, isn't it? Like being sent back to coach after you spent most of the flight in first class. What sucks even more is that the US opening day is at freaking 10:00 at night...which is also the time of the spring training game tonight. Grrr. As much as I love the Red Sox-and I do-it's very, very rare that I get to see much more than an inning or two of a west coast night game.

Just as a completely unrelated item-do you think our sports world has gone completely around the bend when it dedicates, like, three straight days to the fact that an athlete blew a gasket and swore when he wasn't playing well? Why are we all so shocked that Tiger Woods let loose a rant at the paparazzi after blowing a shot at Doral earlier this week? Why did the powers that be on ESPN think they needed to convene a round table to chastise Tiger and talk about how bad it was to say "fuck" in front of all those kids? Oh, please! Makes me want to barf. Could we be more sanctomonious? It's not like no one ever heard the word from Tiger's lips before, or, for that matter, most pro athletes at one time or another. Haven't these people ever watched a Josh Beckett press conference? The boy's first word was "fuck!" I don't think I've ever heard Ozzie Guillen say another word as articulately. I admit, I am an unabashed Tiger fan-I love him-and I think he gets unfairly harassed by the press sometimes. For all the whining Sox fans do about the pressure of the Boston media on the Red Sox, I betcha Tiger would gladly trade places with Manny for a day just to get a little peace. If they don't like it, Tiger, you know I say? Fuck 'em.

A final good thought: This is the last weekend without real baseball for a very long time...hopefully, late October!   

161-1?

There goes the undefeated season. Thank God-just ask the Pats how those turn out.

There are two schools of thought on writing about these types of games, actually. The first one is the rule your mother taught you before you could even say dada: "If you haven't got anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." The second, snarkier version? "If you haven't got anything nice to say, come sit next to me."

Well, since you're already here and sitting down...

I've yet to see what all the fuss is about Jon Lester. Yes, I know he is a cancer survivor; yes, I know there are a lot of people who continue to blame his slow development on that interruption. But facts are facts: he is still suffering from the same problems of high pitch count and poor control as he was when he was first brought up in '06. And for all who are jumping up and down saying, "It's only FOUR INNINGS!" it's still four innings where he showed exactly the same problems that have plagued him from day one. So it's not just four isolated innings-it's the next four innings in the continuum.

The other thing to keep an eye on is the hitting-we saw already that the Sox are going to be perfectly capable of completely shutting down their offense at a moment's notice, which was an issue for them last year. If pitching let them down, they weren't often able to battle back through an offensive explosion. All that makes the performance of your #4 and #5 starters-as of this writing that's Lester and Buchholz-more important than they would be on, say, a 2003 Red Sox team. All we can do is sit back and wait.

Jason Varitek has already K'd six times. In a contract year, he's apparently going for a record-Ryan Howard's 199 K's.

On the bright side, the bullpen perofrmed well, giving up only one run in four innings-David Aardsma turned in a particularly nice outing. Two nice bullpen outings in two games, and Manny, for the first time in a few years, hits a home run before the third week of the season. Way to go, Manny-can we extend you right now, please?

Papi? 0-fer. He sucks. (Kidding, people! Kidding!)

Back home. April 8th can't get here too soon!   

Moss is the Man!!!

No, not that Moss...this Moss:

Another ex-SeaDog making his mark on the bigs! Great job, Brandon! Very Papi-esque!

It was kind of surreal this morning, listening to the game on the radio while going to work instead of coming from work. I saw on tv Manny drive in the go-ahead runs in the top of the sixth, then got in the car just in time to hear Kyle Snyder give up the go-ahead runs in the bottom of the sixth...and already I'm in mid season form, cursing and banging the steering wheel (if you're new to me this season, I'll warn you now that two phrases you will never hear me utter are "it's just one game" or "it's only April-May." My guiding creed is that if you lose a playoff spot by one game it doesn't matter which one game it was, or if you lost it early or late in the season.)

But Brandon saved Snyder's bacon, and then Bob Geren got exactly what he deserved for pulling a Mike  Scioscia. In fact, Scioscia was probably on the line immediately afterwards saying, "Told you so." Manny obviously thought he had a little more of it than he did, stood back to admire it, and then had to dive into second on what could have been a stand up triple. But that's ok, I forgive him, as I forgive Manny everything. It's a game winning RBI no matter where he ended up standing.

Pitching obviously still a little rusty, but I actually thought Dice did a decent job after the first. A few too many walks, but only two hits and six Ks and most importantly, only two runs. Paps looked a little shaky, too, but it's hard to believe he won't settle down in short order. He'd better, after all that squawking about money! And he will.

Sox now have the best record in the league, and they're a half-game up on the Yanks! Woo-hoooo!

I don't have to be anywhere until mid-morning tomorrow, so will get to see the whole game before shuffling off to work for the man. Let's start the season two legs up, guys!

GO SOX!!!

IT'S OPENING DAY!!!!!!!!

At last! So let the good times roll! Yee-hah!

岡島 秀樹 (Japanese for "Hideki Okajima")

Most of the press attention has focused on Dice-K's homecoming, but lest we forget, our favorite set-up  guy Hideki Okajima is having one, too. He took the mound this morning-er, this evening, er-oh, whatever-against the Yomiuri Giants, the Japanese team for whom he pitched for 11 seasons. From mlb.com:

It wasn't total coincidence. The way manager Terry Francona originally plotted out his pitching, Okajima was set to work on Saturday against the Hanshin Tigers. But the reliever made a small request of his manager.

"I told Tito that I wanted to pitch today, because I wanted to face some old teammates," Okajima told the Japanese media.

Before facing those teammates, the crowd at Tokyo Dome roared when Okajima took the bottom of the seventh inning.

"I was nervous," said Okajima. "I didn't have all that cheering when I was pitching in Japan. That was all different. I wasn't bothered by the flashes, but I was nervous when I was warming up."

Now how cool is that?

He pitched a scoreless inning against his old mates, and the Sox won the game 9-2 on the back of a hopefully resurgent J.D. Drew. That must have felt good to Oki, to perform well against people he knows well and respects. But you know the part I liked best about the story? This:

For the last year, Okajima and Matsuzaka have been adjusting to the American culture. But the roles have been reversed the last few days with the Red Sox in Japan.

On Saturday night, Okajima took all the relievers out to eat.

Think about it. The big story all last year is Dice-K this and Dice-K that. Oki is kind of an afterthought, acquired by the Sox primarily to keep Dice company. Of course, he performs well and we all love him, but he's still out of his element. He's not a big star the way Dice-K is. He doesn't speak the language well, doesn't know the city. Probably can't find a squid pizza anywhere. I imagine he relied on his teammates to help him out a lot, to tell him what's a good place to eat or just how to deal with the pressures of pitching in Boston. No matter how smart or talented you are, out of your familiar environment you can feel a little bit clumsy and incompetent. I imagine Hideki felt that way on more than one occasion last year.

Now? For a brief time, he gets to show off his world to his teammates, who can't, um, speak the language, and don't know the city. This time, he's the one who knows where all the good places to eat are. It may seem like a small thing, but I'm guessing it meant a whole lot to him to be able to host his bullpen mates and show them a good time.

I'm only left to wonder if they dressed up like pirates...?

Alarm set, 5:00am Tuesday. I can't wait!

A Good Friday in Japan

Maybe MLB was right. Maybe this Japan trip wasn't such a bad idea after all. At least, I'm enjoying it.  It's been fun watching Papi drink sake in a kimono, watching the guys sign autographs for Japanese little ones, and especially seeing Dice-K in his own element-doesn't he seem relaxed? What a charmer! No wonder he's got such a devoted homeland following! Can you imagine the reception he's going to get when he takes the field in the Tokyo Dome, his "home" park? It'll make the Dave Roberts Fenway reception will look like polite applause at a poetry reading.

FYI, this is what the name "Lisa" looks like in Japanese:

(It's pronounced "RIISA")

I'll be able to watch at least the first 2/3 of Tuesday's season opener (5:00am pre-game show...ugh) and all of Wednesday's game. I can't wait. The wind was absolutely biting here today, the weekend is going to be lousy, but it's June in my heart. What else can you say now but...

LET'S GO RED SOX!!!!!!!

(Image from boston.com)

Norma Rae(d) Sox

"Therefore, they are free to exploit you, to cheat you, to lie to you, and to take away what is rightfully yours - your health, a decent wage, a fit place to work. I would urge you to stop them by coming down to room 207 at the Golden Cherry Motel, to pick up a union card and to sign it... It comes from the Bible - according to the tribes of your fathers, ye shall inherit."-Rueben Warshowsky, Norma Rae

In a show of solidarity with the people who take care of them, the Red Sox got in a staredown with MLB today...and won. Apparently, the league was going to require the coaches and staff members of the Sox to make the trip to Japan without the extra bonus that the players were getting-$40,000. In the past-when the Yankees opened the year in Japan in '04-the coaches were compensated out of the players' pool. That system of payment has since been eliminated, and the coaching staff was left with...nothing. They weren't going to be rewarded for their inconvenience with one thin dime, despite the fact that this is essentially a goodwill trip by the Red Sox and A's to expand MLB's financial tentacles in the region. The Red Sox players-guys who voted WS financial shares to a lot of their supporting players who would otherwise have gotten very little for the Sox' championship effort last year-weren't having it.

"We have to be prepared to take care of what was ultimately promised to our staff and to everybody else that's on the trip," Red Sox catcher and captain Jason Varitek said before the issue was resolved. "This isn't about us; this isn't about anything besides [the fact] that there's other people involved that are being forgotten about."

The players took a principled stand on an issue-one that didn't involve their own wallets!-and did not back down. I'm really proud of this team. It was great...and if you were watching it on NESN, did you see the fans out there with signs of support? The Blue Jays were completely backing up the Sox in their efforts to advocate for their coaches. EVERYBODY was on board with this! Solidarity reigned supreme.

MLB officials seemed taken aback by all this, saying it was all the Players' Association fault for changing the rules that left the coaches without a safety net in these cases, and they seemed a little miffed that they were made to look like the bad guys in all this. But for Gods' sake, the league is practically a mint! What would a little goodwill have cost them? Why did they think it was ok to treat their coaching staff like indentured servants? Now they're tarred as just another corporate behemoth. If it had been the players who were whining about not getting a bonus, I think the sympathy factor would have been nil. But the players were putting it on the line for their staff...and who doesn't dream of a powerful figure backing you up at a time you feel powerless?

Good job, gentlemen. You should be proud of yourselves, and maybe-just maybe-you will light a spark of guilt in the furnace of unbridled greed in corporate lackeys and empty suits everywhere.

Barack yesterday, the Red Sox today. The very best aspects of my two all-consuming worlds within a mere day of each other. Can paradise be far behind?

The answer: no. Because the season starts on Tuesday!

A Run for Real

"The Rockets' run had run dry. The NBA's hottest team ran into the league's best team. The winning streak, stretching 22 games long and longer than all but one in NBA history, was demolished by the Boston Celtics' 94-74 rout Tuesday night, before 18,525 at Toyota Center, the largest home crowd in Rockets history."-Jonathan Feigen, Houston Chronicle

First, they slay the Spurs in San Antonio, coming back from  24 points down. Now, they take down the flying-high Rockets, and both done without Ray Allen on the floor.

Maybe these guys are for real after all.

People are believing. People are coming back. I remember my friend Cyn once saying she was once as big a Celtics fan as she is a Red Sox fan, until Rick Pitino told us we sucked. It looks like she's coming back. Is she emblematic?

This is the beauty about being a New England sports fan right now-if one team stumbles, another is right there to pick them up. To pick us up. Sorry, Boston haters, you'll all just have to wear yourselves out playing whack-a-mole trying to pull our teams down.